Greetings from the Odinson,
The last few weeks the Odinson has pitted the Rogues of the DC Universe against the Rogues of the Marvel Universe. I did not realize the can of worms I would be opening. I heard from friends, family, co-workers, and even you, the sweet, clean Lone Star Comics customers, about how wrong I was in so many of my decisions. It turns out that fanboys are just as passionate about their villains as they are about their heroes. I guess I should have made my point clear from the beginning. This was not a popularity contest. I did not make my decisions based on what villains I liked better. If that were the case, Captain America’s Rogues would have defeated Flash’s, but they didn’t. It was which group of thugs I thought would win a no holds barred throw down.
Do I think the Joker is one of the greatest villains in the history of comics? Absolutely. Do I think he can defeat guys like Doctor Octopus, the Lizard or Carnage in battle? No. That’s not taking anything away from the Clown Prince of Crime or, as one critic put it, underestimating him. That’s just how I see it going down. Also, a lot of you are being very dismissive of the New Teen Titan’s foes. If anybody is being underestimated, it’s this group which includes an immortal cleric that bathes in the blood of his enemies, a nigh-omnipotent demon god, and an evil super soldier that has handed Batman his own teeth.
Now, I’ll be the first to admit that a few of the tussles were pretty one-sided. Thor’s Rogues were just way too much for Wonder Woman’s. And it probably wasn’t fair to pit the Hulk’s foes, a group comprised mainly of muscle-heads and strong guy henchmen, against the likes of Lex Luthor and Brainiac. So, I’m here to rectify it all. Going down right now is the super villain battle to end all super villain battles. A Royal Rumble of Evil, if you will. The Odinson Presents:
Rogue War: Bonus Round: Rogues of the Marvel Universe vs. Rogues of the DC Universe
Admittedly, I had a little help on this one. I was sent a video on YouTtube titled: Marvel vs. DC: Villains, which I encourage everyone to check out. It is on the same lines as what I was going for in these columns. I really liked the intriguing match ups this person came up with so those are the match-ups I’m going to use to decide once and for all whose Rogues Gallery is the most sinister – Marvel’s or DC’s. However, I did have to move a few of the contestants around because as tough as I think Bane is, he’s just not in the Juggernaut’s league. Now, without further ado…
Let Mortal Kombat begin!
Thanos vs. Darkseid – Winner: Thanos. Now it’s a party. Right out of the gate Marvel and DC’s two biggest baddest villains go at it. Truly this is an epic battle, and a very evenly matched one. It probably comes down to whether or not Thanos can survive an assault by Darkseid’s Omega Beams, and I believe that he can. In the end, Thanos edges out the dark lord of Apokalips. Darkseid may have destroyed New Genesis, but Thanos killed half the Marvel Universe with a snap of his finger.
Apocalypse vs. Brainiac – Winner: Brainiac. Another intriguing match up right off the bat, but Brainiac can bring solar powered Kryptonians to their knees and it takes a Herculean effort from the world’s greatest super hero to defeat him every time he shows up. Apocalypse really hasn’t made any leeway in the world-conquering front and he’s been at it for what, 5,000 years?
Kingpin vs. Lex Luthor – Winner: Lex Luthor. Wilson Fisk is a criminal mastermind that has carved out an empire in the underbelly of New York City. He is a physically imposing man whose strength (perhaps the greatest that can be achieved without the help of a super soldier formula) and fighting ability can give pause to the super ninja Daredevil and the augmented strength of Spider-Man. But Lex Luthor is the smartest man alive. He has bigger fish to fry, namely a big blue boy scout, and Fisk is just in his way.
Black Cat vs. Catwoman – Winner: Catwoman. For all intents and purposes, these two femme fatales bring the same skill sets to the battlefield, except Felicia has the power to bring bad luck to others. However, the deck has been stacked against Selina her whole life. A little bad luck won’t deter her.
Baron Zemo vs. Prometheus – Winner: Prometheus. Baron Zemo is crafty and physically proficient, but Prometheus once single-handedly brought the JLA to its knees, not to mention the ability to download anybody’s fighting skill into his brain. Perhaps Taskmaster would have been a better opponent.
Norman Osborn vs. The Joker – Winner: The Joker. What happens when bat-S crazy meets bat-S crazy? Utter chaos. Norman may have goblin strength, a million deadly gadgets, a genius level intellect, a billion dollar corporation and a small army of super villains at his disposal, but the Joker has Smiley Gas. And if you’re gonna go, go with a smile.
Enchantress vs. Poison Ivy – Winner: Enchantress. Well, since seducing each other is out of the question (or is it? Hmm), this battle comes down to physical attributes (I know, I know, the picture almost paints itself, he-he). Amora is an immortal and Ivy just can’t match her physical strength and magical powers.
Red Skull vs. Two-Face – Winner: Red Skull. This would be, without a doubt, the most down and dirty street fight ever seen. They may even beat each other sane. Harvey is one tough customer, but the Red Skull is in a cloned body of Steve Rogers and has been scheming and plotting since before Two-Face was born.
Venom vs. Clayface – Winner: Venom. Physically, I’m really not sure there is anything either of these guys can do to injure the other. In the end, Venom is just stronger and the symbiote he wears as a second skin is a devious little critter and would probably edge him into the win column.
Red Hulk vs. Solomon Grundy – Winner: Red Hulk. Solomon Grundy is huge, strong, and scary, he may have even been born on a Monday, but unless your name is Superman, Thor, or Silver Surfer, then you aren’t beating a Hulk.
Deadpool vs. Deathstroke – Winner: Deathstroke. I know there are a lot of Merc with a Mouth fans out there, but come on, Wade is just ridiculous and Slade does not suffer fools. Deadpool maybe able to heal from any wound but by the time he finishes gathering up all the pieces the Terminator has hacked off him, the contest will be over.
Super Skrull vs. Amazo – Winner: Amazo. Sorry, the combined powers and abilities of the Justice League trumps the combined powers and abilities of the Fantastic Four. Superman by himself can defeat Marvel’s First Family (see Fantastic Four #249). Now if Super Skrull had Reed Richard’s intellect that might be something.
Doctor Doom vs. Ra’s Al Ghul – Winner: Doctor Doom. This is an epic mini series in the making. Ra’s Al Ghul is a weapons master with the resources of a criminal empire under his command and pseudo immortality that gives him a century’s worth of experiences and knowledge to draw from, but nobody beats Doom, nobody. Doctor Doom is arguably the smartest man alive, a creator and innovator of super science and a practitioner of magic whose skills in the arcane fall somewhere just below the Master of the Mystic Arts himself. Victor Von Doom is the super hero of the super villain community. He wins, period.
Mandarin vs. Sinestro - Winner: Sinestro. The Mandarin is powerful, but he has demonstrated in the past cracks in his psyche, whereas Sinestro is seemingly cold and unaffected. Sinestro’s will power is indomitable.
Loki vs. Felix Faust – Winner: Loki. Faust may be an archmage of the highest order and able to fool the World’s Greatest Super Heroes with magic, but Loki has been playing tricks on the gods and titans for eons.
Mystique vs. Harley Quinn – Winner: Mystique. Now, this one is almost too close to call. What wins out, unpredictability and a devil-may-care natural born killer or the ice cold, calculating steady hand of an assassin? I could go either way on this one, but in the end, I’m going with the shape-shifter.
Ultron vs. Metallo – Winner: Ultron. Ultron is the deadliest killer robot ever conceived. He makes the Terminator look like a Care Bear. Anything that can send shivers up the spine of the mighty Thor is going to win, period.
Mr. Sinister vs. Black Hand – Winner: Mr. Sinister. Even at his best (Blackest Night), Black Hand was little more than a flunky. People like the Marauders, Sabretooth, Dark Beast and the Sugar Man call Mr. Sinister master.
Lady Deathstrike vs. Cheetah – Winner: Lady Deathstrike. Cheetah has great speed and strength and is as feral as they come, but Lady Deathstrike is a cyborg killing machine that on several occasions has fought and nearly killed Wolverine, the baddest dude on the planet.
Mephisto vs. Neron – Winner: Mephisto. Nobody out-devils the devil.
Exodus vs. Black Adam – Winner: Exodus. Now this showdown is truly delicious. Black Adam is a super man whose physical power rivals the strongest beings walking the earth. But the powers of Exodus are seemingly without end, or limit. This is an extremely close one, but the mental abilities of Exodus edge him past Teth-Adam.
Mole Man vs. Penguin – Winner: Mole Man. The Penguin is a tricky little sucker but Mole Man actually knows martial arts not to mention he has an army of Moloids and an island full of giant monsters under his command.
Bullseye vs. Deadshot – Winner: Deadshot. Without a doubt, this is the quickest showdown on the list. While Bullseye is fumbling for a deck of cards or reaching for a dagger, Deadshot has already put one right between his eyes.
Goblin Queen vs. Circe – Winner: Circe. The inexperience and fragile psyche of the Jean Grey clone would wilt to the power of a witch that has been causing trouble since the The Odyssey.
Sabretooth vs. Grodd – Winner: Grodd. Because of his healing factor, Sabretooth would last longer than most, but if Grodd doesn’t tear him limb-from-limb with his gorilla strength then he’ll melt Creed’s brain with the power of his mind.
Juggernaut vs. Doomsday – Winner: Doomsday. The Earth will shake when these titans clash. Cain Marko is the earthly avatar of a crimson god and notoriously unstoppable, but Doomsday is the engine of destruction that killed Superman. Good brawl, Doomsday wins.
Bane vs. Crossbones – Winner: Bane. Crossbones is a deadly assassin and strong fighter, but for all his skill, he is still just the Red Skull’s henchman. Bane is stronger, faster, and smarter.
Hela vs. Silver Banshee – Winner: Hela. Silver Banshee may be able to incapacitate Superman with her wail, but no way does she defeat a dark power that can even make the All Father shutter.
Moonstone vs. Star Sapphire – Winner: Star Sapphire. Pretty evenly matched, but in the end, Moonstone probably just gets recruited, given a violet ring and becomes an ambassador of love in the DCU.
Kang vs. Chronos – Winner: Kang. No way does a guy that has single-handedly fought Earth’s Mightiest Heroes to a standstill get defeated by a guy dressed like Chronos.
Radioactive Man vs. Chemo – Winner: Chemo. Radioactive Man is six feet six inches tall. Chemo is one hundred feet tall. Chemo steps on Radioactive Man, fight over.
Titania vs. Giganta – Winner: Titania. Though not quite as strong as Wonder Woman, Titania is in that league. TKO.
Lizard vs. Killer Croc – Winner: Lizard. The Lizard is smarter, faster, and stronger than Croc. Croc’s wrestling prowess will allow him to get in some good shots, but in the end, the Lizard will out reptile Croc.
Madame Masque vs. Talia – Winner: Talia. Pretty similar origins and skill sets, but the daughter of the Demon is just a step above the daughter of Count Nefaria.
Whirlwind vs. Zoom – Winner: Zoom. Zoom is too fast and too smart, but Whirlwind is just fast enough to get in some really nasty cuts and stabs.
Hobgoblin vs. Scarecrow – Winner: Hobgoblin. Sorry, Crane, but there just isn’t anything you can concoct with your fear gas that is scarier than a madman the flies around on a glider, a lunatic with goblin strength, a bag of deadly gadgets and weapons who cackles like a madman while dropping pumpkin bombs on his prey.
Black Mamba vs. Cheshire – Winner: Cheshire. These two sultry women are probably immune to each others’ poisons and toxins. Black Mamba can create illusions, but Jade is one of the deadliest fighters alive.
Mysterio vs. Abra Kadabra – Winner: Mysterio. In the worlds of fiction there are many practitioners of tricks and illusions, but even among his peers, Mysterio is the Master of Illusions.
Scorpion vs. Copperhead – Winner: Scorpion. Scorpion’s tail can smash a cement wall into powder. Besides, he’d just use his super human strength to tie the contortionist into a knot and toss him into the Hudson River.
Blizzard vs. Mr. Freeze – Winner: Mr. Freeze. Remember that scene from Bastard when Dark Schneider pulled off the impossible and defeated a fire elemental with a fire spell? Well, Victor Fries’ heart is so cold that he would freeze Blizzard where he stood and shatter him into a thousand little pieces.
Puppet Master vs. Mad Hatter – Winner: Mad Hatter. Coin flip. Who gets their mind-controlling in play first? My money is on the slightly younger, slightly more spry guy.
Absorbing Man vs. Parasite – Winner: ???? This is the most intriguing match up on the list. By the gods, what would happen if Crusher Creel and the Parasite met? Whatever the outcome it can’t be good. This one is a draw.
Total: Marvel 21 wins/DC 20 wins AND 1 tie
Now that was a close contest.
So there you have it, 42 no holds barred throw downs to decide just who is the most sinister and feared Rogues Gallery in the Comic Book Omniverse. Disagree with any of the outcomes? Did your favorite villain not make the list of elite? Do you have a different take, maybe better match-ups? Let me know.
This is Odinson bidding thee farewell