Outer Orbit (2006) comic books
In space, no one can hear you scream . . . or belch, or swear, or cry like a little girl when you're about to be taken down by merciless interstellar bounty hunters who want that mysterious idol you swiped from that hot chick who inexplicably gave you the tip of a lifetime (if you know what I mean) when you showed up at the wrong hotel room with the pizza delivery. This assumes that 'you' are ne'er-do-well big-talker Quinn and explains-sort of-how 'you' hooked up (not like that!) with a big badass of a former galactic cop (and current mama's boy) by the name of Krunk, who is not your partner and not your buddy, got it? Oh, and by the way, the hot chick is hotter than ever (in the bad way) and she wants that idol back, and this time she's probably going to give you a different kind of gratuity, like with a laser ax or a plasma grenade or something. Try talking your way out of that one, spacehole! Created by Zach Howard (Shaun of the Dead) and Sean Murphy (Scarecrow: Year One; Off Road), with screenwriter Hans Rodionoff, Outer Orbit is outrageous, rude, hilarious space fantasy that takes the time-honored traditions of this beloved genre and leaves them face-down in a filthy alley in a pool of their own sick. Cover price $2.99.
What do you get when you mix two down-and-out space-idiots, an angry space-sexpot, a priceless space-idol, and a herd of murderous, revenge-seeking space-zealots? How would we know-we asked you! See Quinn and Krunk try to entertain the trigger-happy 3-Dog and his faithful cohorts with their butt-clenching tale of high adventure. See Quinn finally sort out his relationship with the irresistible Neoki with the simple aid of a breaching bomb. See Krunk tackle the awesome task of figuring out what his mom wants for Mother's Day (what do you get a lady who wears a welding mask to the hair salon?), but figures out how to cure his insomnia-with a brick! Created without a lick of shame by Zach Howard (Shaun of the Dead) and Sean Murphy (Scarecrow: Year One; Off Road), with screenwriter Hans Rodionoff, Outer Orbit is high-velocity, intergalactic action that puts the ass in assinine, featuring more grown men in thongs than a Lance Bass calendar shoot! Text and illustrations of Outer Orbit? © 2006 Sean Murphy and Zach Howard. Cover price $2.99.
It's a miracle that astro-nots Krunk and Quinn have managed to stay out of the joint this long, but their luck has run out. Now residents of Honest Abe's Penitentiary, Krunk and Quinn have to find a way out or learn to make new friends (if you know what I mean). Luckily, Krunk's big, bad mom ain't about to let her baby boy go punk, and woe be to he who gets in her way . . . or who doesn't. Meanwhile, vengeful space-hottie Neoki realizes that to get back her priceless idol, she's going to need the key around Quinn's neck-and she's going to have to get it before the time bomb around his neck goes boom! Relentlessly marching forward in their quest to embarrass their families, Zach Howard (Shaun of the Dead) and Sean Murphy (Scarecrow: Year One; Off Road), with screenwriter Reed Buccholz, have created Outer Orbit, an 'epic' science-fiction/action-comedy/adjective-noun forged from equal parts stupidity, idiocy, and imbecility. And in case you were wondering, yes, sheep are involved. Cover price $2.99.
Let's add up just exactly how stupid our intergalactic super zeros are, shall we? Did they blab to a poker-playing group of gangsters about the existence of a priceless idol? Check. And where to find it? Check. And that the key to open its lock box is around Krunk's neck? Check and mate. Suffice it to say, the crooks decide to go all-in and take Krunk's key and snatch the idol from the ultra-hot, and ultra-hot-tempered, Neoki, who's waiting for a mystery buyer to pony up hella cash for the treasured artifact. Of course, big bad Krunk isn't about to give up the key without a lot of collateral damage, and the boys manage to escape the mayhem and head toward the rendezvous with Neoki. With the gangsters in hot pursuit. And with the bounty-hunting Seekers in even hotter pursuit. Maybe all these thugs wouldn't be so eager to catch up if they knew Quinn still has a ticking time-bomb around his neck! Cover price $2.99.